Why Don't Engineers Write Cookery Books?

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Claymore

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 2, 2015
Messages
406
Location
Chesterfield, Derbyshire, UK
Why Engineers Don't Write Cook Books? Here is why:

Chocolate Chip Cookies

Ingredients:

1.) 532.35 cm3 gluten

2.) 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3

3.) 4.9 cm3 refined halite

4.) 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride

5.) 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11

6.) 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11

7.) 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde

8.) Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein

9.) 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao

10.) 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)

To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation.

In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous.

To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to control any temperature rise that may be the result of an exothermic reaction.

Using a screw extrude attached to a #4 nodulizer, place the mixture piece-meal on a 316SS sheet (300 x 600 mm). Heat in a 460K oven for a period of time that is in agreement with Frank &Johnston's first order rate expression (see JACOS, 21, 55), or until golden brown. Once the reaction is complete, place the sheet on a 25C heat-transfer table, allowing the product to come to equilibrium.

:eek:

JimB
 
They are not real engineers. No charts, no mention of CVT, nothing about battery temperatures in the hand blender....they need to re-evaluate their careers.
 
No need to insult me; engineer? sheesh!

I can sell you anything to do with Space (satellites and launch vehicles) but I couldn't draw one let alone build one.

:lol:
 
:lol:

Comprehending Engineers :ugeek:
**********************************
Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, ”Where did you get such a great bike?”

The second engineer replied, “Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, “Take what you want.”

The second engineer nodded approvingly, “Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”

Comprehending Engineers :geek:
**********************************
Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.

One said, “It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints.”
Another said, “No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections.”

The last said, “Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?”



Lastly, From a high school math class. The teacher used it to explain the phrase "for all practical purposes". :mrgreen:

He said if you lined all the boys in the class against one wall and the girls against the other, then told the boys to move half the distance to the girls and stop. Then, told them to move half the remaining distance and stop, again and again, the boys would never actually reach the girls, but in time, would become close enough "for all practical purposes".
 
Which reminds me of the time an optimist, a pessimist and an engineer were discussing drinks. The optimist saw the glass as half full, the pessimist said it was half empty and the engineer said the glass was too big for the volume of liquid it had to contain.
 
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